million dollar confusion

Are we Devotees? Or, are we Slaves? Or, are we Cons? Or, are we Smart?
These questions have been bogged inside my mind from the day, I was able to understand the concept of “The God”.

Are we Devotees? Of course, we are. We fast at temples, we pray at churches, we bow in gurudwaras, we read namaaz at mosques. I gave it a thought that, how and from where we learnt these? and I came to conclusion, that these were incorporated in us by our parents, and they got from their’s. I am also sure that the origin of these is the scripts written in our holy books or what we call them granths. I have been reading a lot about this subject of what every religion wants it’s devotees to follow. What I could understand was this:

“don’t use those words which may hurt any person” 
“do not believe in superstitions”
“help each other irrespective of caste, creed or colour”
“respect Women”
"Forgive and Forget”
“Karam karo phal ki icchha mat karo”
“Contentment is better than wealth”
“God is one” 

And many other ideal things or we can term these as heavy teachings. But the question is, are we following any of these? Lets take the above one by one into consideration.

we do not hesitate or even think before using those words that may hurt people, because in the end what matters is success or promotions – self-profits

we still try to fool God offering him Prasad, some specific counts of visits, offering milk and honey during occasions, and for what?, just to make some of our crucial wishes true – bribery

we help those who can help us or we are sure that they will help us, otherwise, helping someone who is not able to barter their help is just a waste of time – investment

“yatr naraystu poojayante ramante tatr devtaa” i.e. where WOMEN are respected, GODs make their Home, but we have totally forgotten any kind of these worships. We still molest, harass, rape and burn them – hypocrisy

we do not forget what someone has done to us, so there is no point to forgive. “eent ka jawaab patthar se” -  enemy

karam wohi karo jiska phal milna confirm ho, warna time waste mat karo – pakke businessman

we have our personal gods, moreover, we are enjoying the privilege of having 33 crore deities. And when we felt there is scarcity of gods, we started following godmen who are believed to have some mystical powers – selfgod

and there is no contentment. We always want more either it’s success or fame or money. We have basically forgotten the concept of adjustments, sacrifices and compromises. However, where there is no contentment, there is no inner peace. And in the absence of contentment, there will be no difference between us and animals. The cost of wealth, these days, is more as compared to human love and care, which definitely is priceless – selfish

Are we slaves? Yes, we are. we are foolish slaves. We do not even know the difference between a follower and a slave. But, we are strong believers of any kind of superstitions. We do not want to face and solve the problems, on the other hand, we believe that the God himself will come and solve all the problems. Ye to wohi baat hui “I will drive my car on the day when all the traffic lights of the town will be green”. We have the attitude to lay back and hold God responsible for everything being happened. I feel pity on us. Wake up! He has gifted us with this beautiful brain. Use it!

Are we cons? Ofcourse, we are. We do know how to use the name of the god for our benefits and to make fool of others. We even try to ditch God too. “Agar tum kaali daal shaniwar ko kale kutte ko khilaoge to tumhara ye kaam pakka hojayega” (i.e. if you’ll offer black pulse to black dog on Saturday, you’ll get success for sure), “behanji, lagataar paanch guruwaar paanch pandito ko pakwaan khilao apka pati sharaab chhod dega” (i.e. mam, offer lunch to five godmen for five Thursdays continuously to make your husband teetotaler), “beta, neelam ko sone me jadwaake ungli mein pehno, naukri pakka milegi” (sorry, it’s bit difficult to translate). Point here is, we are following all these from hundreds of years without any break, aren’t we tired?

Are we smart? Definitely, we are. Success is ours but Faults are yours. “shayad bhagwan ko yahi manzoor tha” (i.e. it was all in the hands of almighty), “maine to koshish ki thi par ye to upar wale ki galti hai” (i.e. I tried everything but it’s all the fault of god). Did the god come on ground to increase the number of speed breakers? Or he himself has personal grudges with you? You know what, we, basically close our eyes using the above sentences to escape from any kind of situation which we are not capable to tackle. Actually, we do not want to portray us as a weak human, but if there is some scenario which we cannot handle, we blame god as the ultimate villain, who is creating problems around you. Man! We are perfect, isn't it? I salute us.

 So, I am still confused. I am still in enigma about what we really are.

 I am still looking for answers to some very simple questions.

 Are we the most confused creatures on the planet or are the smartest of all?

that 'was' an indian thing..

(article mentioned in the blog is available at this link: 

http://www.thehindu.com/todays-paper/tp-features/tp-openpage/that-truly-indian-thing/article6994645.ece )

On 15^th march, 2015, I read an article in The Hindu with title “that truly Indian thing”, an article which was about the topic which I have been reading from the time since I was able to understand the English language and Indian society. The article was purely based on the need and wishes of “Indian Men” who have the mentality to be in relationship or married to a fair complexioned women. But, I must say the topic of the article still has spark, as it lead to an unending debate with my colleagues.

I agree with the content that majority of the Indian Men do have the mentality to be with a beautiful, cute, sexy and hot female with the fusion of Indian values. They really want to be with a female who should be a combination of looks, values and brain. Also, the family of the guy also wants to have their daughter in law to be perfect in everything, both in appearance as well as family values.

However, what I want to say is, don’t the women want their companion to be smart, intelligent and good earner? I am not offending what was in the article but there are always two sides of the coin. The society and time in which I first read about the articles on same topic has been changed, and truly it changed a lot. Me and my colleagues are in the right age to get married and some of them are about to get married soon. We had a very healthy debate about the article and majority of us agreed to the conclusion that looks doesn’t matter always. Further, I have not met a single girl who do not wants her husband to be handsome, fair, chivalric and with the values of respecting every female on the earth. Believe it, this is a typical human nature.

Every human being somewhere in their mind has a checklist, whether Indian or western or any other place on the world map because it is in our nature to pursue for best. No one wants their companion to be bad looking, dumb or adamant, neither a man nor a woman.

I respect all the thoughts which were put into the article but there is also an other section of the society now, which should be examplified. Though, we Indians are lagging somewhere about this sensitive topic, but the youth is taking the stand to eradicate these kind of lame practices from the society.

Women in our society or not the one who make compromises, sacrifices and devote their selves to lead a healthy married life, however, men are in the same boat too. They also want to spend a harmonious married life without any difficulties and pressure. Believe it or not, men have more pressure to change their lifestyle when a woman is about to move in with them. I would like to share my experience here. A friend of mine met a girl, officially with the permission from both of their parents, before taking any decision to get married. The guy was handsome, a very good earner, gentleman and understanding. The girl was intelligent, good looking and career oriented. Both, spent a day together and found that they are compatible with each other but there were some issues which they decided to handle themselves because they knew they have to alter their lifestyle to make space for each other. But, at the end the girl denied on the ground of finances, as she explained that her lifestyle is somewhat superior than that of the guy. Both respected the decision.

So, these days are far far different from the days in which our parents or their parents got married. The era right now is of mutual understanding and collective decisions. The game now is not man oriented.

And we men are not from Mars, we are very much from the planet Earth and we may still be in search of our Cynthia, but that Cynthia doesn’t need to prove herself to be with us. Let’s discuss the checklist of each other together and convert it into single check list of our own.

From, one of an Indian man.